Fantasies
Sharing fantasies is obviously a simple way of establishing ideas for a scene and may incorporate dressing up in character, e.g. nurse, doctor, fireman, lap dancer, etc.
There may be particular actions or activities that a partner would like to experiment with. These can often be identified by ‘story-telling’ sessions, whereby each partner tells a story, maybe with fictional characters or themselves and/or partner, which describes a fictitious sexual encounter, including specific details about locations, props and ‘most importantly’ who does what to whom and how?
This is an excellent way of presenting ideas/fantasies to a partner who may take certain elements or, if you are lucky, all of them into account when playing their own character in a BDSM role-play session. Even ‘vague concepts’ can be indicated and a partner may add their own take on how activities can be introduced into a scenario.
A key piece of advice is to not express any surprise or disgust for the ideas presented by your partner, even if they do not appeal to you.
The creation of ‘scenes’ and the events that occur should be considered to be an evolving process over time. It takes effort to get it right and keep it fresh and exciting. Talking about it and raising possible ‘enhancements’ is essential. Such discussions do not need to be restricted to the bedroom … a phone call at the office with some specific details of future events are certainly worth taking!
Sowing ideas in your partner’s head is essential if you are to get what you really want.
Role-play
Sexual role-playing involves some kind of character, in order to evoke a sexual fantasy.
Any role could become the material for an erotic experience. Many of the most common sexual role-plays, such as Doctor/Nurse, Guard/Prisoner and Teacher/Student, involve a power differential. Often, role-playing is used to create a sexual act that might otherwise be considered to be taboo or forbidden.
Some common characters in sexual role-playing include:
|
|
- Knight/Damsel in Distress
|
|
- Magician/Magician's Assistant
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sometimes role-playing may occur where one party remains as "his/herself" while the other takes on the persona of a celebrity or a fictional character.
Outfits are often a key component in any role playing scenario and we have included a few examples:
Nurse |
College Girl |
French Maid |

|

|

|
Provided by 'XXX Fetish'
Talk-play
Suggestive, sexual or even abusive language may be used by the parties.
The submissive may be commanded to admit certain fictional accusations, such as “acknowledging they are a whore” or “they love the punishment being administered to them”.
Take care not to get too carried away with your accusations; they are meant to stimulate and arouse your partner not generate an argument or present an arena for debate!
Rewards and Punishments
Rewards for ‘good behavior’ can be given by the Dominant in the form of pleasure or pain, although ‘punishments’ for non-compliance are obviously also common and may include the withdrawal of ‘stimulation’ until forgiveness is considered appropriate.
Punishments may include bringing a Submissive close to orgasm and then ceasing all contact until their plateau phase begins to ebb and then repeating the process continually. The Dominant must skillfully judge the level of stimulation in order to deny the Submissive the pending orgasm until the Dominant believes the Submissive has earned their release.
A Dominant may demand that a Submissive seeks permission to achieve orgasm and must hold back the event until permission is granted (within reason and without deliberate continued stimulation by the Dominant!)
Furniture
There is no end or limitations to the creation of an environment in which to enjoy your scene.
If you really want to push your limits then you may consider investing in some BDSM furniture in order to establish some reality to your fantasies.
There are endless options and choices that enable you to act out pretty much every scenario you might consider, which include specialist bondage beds, swings and harnesses, liberators even cages!
Building your own dungeon may seem a little extreme, but who knows...if you have the room it might add value to your property!
|